Oisín McShane

So our Úna's gone and had her first baby boy. A baby brother for Caoimhe, her first-born. And she's calling him Oisín. A fine name. A poet-warrior (don't you love the old Irish, the way you didn't have to specialise at the expense of your other talents - you could write sensitive verse and kill your enemies?). Only this Oisín isn't the son of Fionn Mac Cumhail, but Kevin, her husand.

I've still to meet young Oisín, so of course I've googled him prior to the meeting. And fabulous! Oisín McShane is not one of those common-type names where you've 1000s of pages to trawl through before you find the one you're looking for! Indeed there were no exact google results for young Oisín McShane at all!

Now, there aren't a hundred million results for Úna Gallen on google (ok...one if you search for "una gallen") and Úna McShane isn't wildly popular (54 results!) but by choosing Oisín as her son's name, my sister has got the .com etc etc etc, and the chance to fill up EMPTY google search results with her son.

Now that's the future spread before you like golden cloaks :)

I have yet to ask her, but I presume she wasn't like this American couple, who googled all the different permutations of their child's name, until they found the perfect mix of not very weird and highly google rated...

Alarm Clock for Geeks

I've just had another one of my fabulous ideas. This one's an alarm clock for geeks.

Geeks don't like to get up early. It's a well-known fact that geeks like the night-time, closed curtains and unopened windows. So when a geek gets a job and has to atune their body clock to the Real World, they sometimes have punctuality issues.

So what I was thinking is that we need to create Geek Alarm Clocks(TM), which don't just play some random noise on being triggered, but instead play an ident, like the Mac noise, or my sony vaio noise, or the windows start-up theme.

Upon hearing the geek-specific sound, the geek will enter directly into start-up mode, causing the geek to jump straight out of bed and into the kitchen where they will run the strong coffee application. The fag and scratch app is optional. But the shave, shower and sh*t* app will be mandatory.

Preferably the Geek Alarm Clock(TM) will be a piece of hardware implanted in the geek's ear, although my early protoypes are predicted to resemble this:

Problem solving

Quote
"No problem is so big or so complicated that it can't be run away from" Charles Schultz

Question
Is this cat running away from something or is it dead?

Surfing = Sinus Pain

So there were waves last week and the weekend. So I had a few surfs. The first one was mellow. Small slow waves. Took her handy. I was tired out afterwards and went straight to bed. Woke up the next day with a sinus headache. I had a few more surfs over the weekend, my last midday yesterday.

And today I didn't want to get out of bed with a sinus infection...I'm all pressure headache and dizzy head. Last year I gave up surfing coz of a really bad sinus infection that led to vertigo.

How come doing something you love so much, that makes you feel so buzzed up, has this big fat horrible downside?

It's like:

- drinking red wine = headpain
- eating loads of chocolate cake = fat arse
- soaking up sun = wrinkleface
- buying all the pretty things you see in the shops = debtcollectors

Humph.

Fairy Luck Dust

Hmmm. It's been one of those weeks. Dominated by DIY, belly-ache and stress. So after spraying the living-room radiator a sort-of white shade this morning, I realised I'd inhaled too many fumes, and went to my bedroom to get away from the chemicals.

I lay on the bed for a few moments and closed my eyes. I decided I'd do a bit of meditation. But instead I had this daydream that the Luck Fairy came into my room and sneaked a pouch of Luck Dust under my pillow.

Luck Dust, as everyone knows, is a extremely powerful and very rare substance, the possession of which can earn you periods of outrageous good fortune. Entry to casinos or the All-Ireland Gaelic Football Championship are outlawed if you are in possession of Luck Dust.

Unfortunately, upon checking under my pillow I found that I am not indeed the proud owner of 5grams of Luck Dust.

Still. With the Spider Massage Academy in the early stages of foundation, I shall soon be in no need of luck, as I shall build me an empire founded on eight gentle feet.